Written by Sarah Millican

Voices

Sarah Millican: tour guide

Our glorious founder Sarah Millican is embarking on an epic UK tour of her new show, Outsider. She’ll be sending us dispatches from the frontline of comedy as she visits towns, cities and islands across the UK.

Sarah tour posterI’m on the brink of my fourth tour and my emotions are a mixture of hope-everything-goes-OK nerves, little claps of whoop and – is ‘diarrhoea-ry’ a word? No? – let’s call it ‘liquid excitement’.

This is the longest tour I’ve done and covers the most areas. We’re going to islands as well as Ireland this time. Specifically Man, Wight and Jersey.

My tour prep involves low-level scribbling for two years, a shitload of new material gigs, too many notebooks (there’s no such thing, ha!), new boots (any excuse) and some Imodium (Instants – that ‘work within the hour’! I might as well block my arsehole with the box).

The main things I’m looking forward to on this tour are:

1. Doing my job. I love my job and I’ll be doing it loads. *beams*

2. My audiences. They are a joy.

3. Hotels. I love my home, sure, but I know what all of the buttons there do.

4. Figuring out what series of moves will allow me to watch the telly from the bath.

5. Spending time with friends (also my support acts).

6. Watching the dog (when he occasionally joins me) enjoy a service station like it’s an actual destination.

7. Killing time in random places. I’m good at it these days.

8. Chips. We’re allowed them whenever the tour is visiting the coast. (Or if we just fancy them.)

9. Backstage preparation. I love the tea and the eating and the makeup doing.

10. Just being back on the road. Doing what I love the most.

And so it begins…

Sarah’s Outsider tour kicks off tonight at the Arc, Stockton-on-Tees and runs until 23 September 2016. Visit her website for more dates and details: www.sarahmillican.co.uk

@SarahMillican75

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Written by Sarah Millican

Sarah Millican is a comedian, writer, reformed workaholic, feminist, cat and dog mam, wife and lover of food.