Fiona Longmuir

Fiona Longmuir

Fiona Longmuir is a professional storyteller, reluctant adult and aspiring funny girl. When not getting naked in tube stations and binge-watching inappropriate TV shows, she can be found scribbling at the Escapologist's Daughter.


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Milo sandwich

“Make me a sammich, bitch!” squeaked one internet goon. HELL YEAH, came the reply. Fiona Longmuir can hardly stop laughing long enough to hashtag.
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Rated or Dated: Trainspotting

With news that the film version of the sequel may be in the pipeline, Fiona Longmuir looks at the 90s classic to see if it’s stood the test of time.
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Standing with Ahmed

A bright teenage Muslim boy was arrested and suspended in Texas for making a clock and bringing it into school. Fiona Longmuir joins President Obama in standing shoulder to shoulder with Ahmed, and she doesn’t think we should be standing for this kind of shit anymore.
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The Hungry Games

Poverty porn hits a new low, as the BBC proposes to pit blue collar workers against each other to win a cash prize. Fiona Longmuir couldn’t be more disgusted.
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Kindness Vs Cuts

It’s the first full Tory government since 1997 and already the forthcoming cuts look swingeing. Left-wingers and liberals have responded with anger, but, argues Fiona Longmuir, it’s kindness that will really count.
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A singularly stupid fascination

Chuka Umunna’s decision to pull out of the Labour leadership race should have us asking questions of the media. Not least, says Fiona Longmuir, does anyone really care if our politicians are married or not?
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The big issue of body image

Following a public shaming on Facebook, Topshop is ditching its super-skinny mannequins. And rightly so, says Fiona Longmuir.
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Why Mhairi Black is an inspiration to us all

The 20 year-old MP’s maiden speech has now been viewed online more than 10 million times. Fiona Longmuir isn’t surprised. Here, she salutes a young woman whose passion, humour and clear-headed vision for her country is a shot in the arm for UK politics.
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Are you social media viral ready?

When a bikini-clad Fiona Longmuir and her mate Tara Costello took a photo in front of that Protein World poster, she didn’t realise quite how much impact it would have.
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Review: To Kill a Mockingbird

As Harper Lee’s long-awaited Go Set a Watchman hits the shelves, Fiona Longmuir is stirred once again by a timely stage adaptation of the author’s unforgettable tale of injustice.